Revising the 1Report

To start, it took me a while to understand what I did wrong on my rough draft because it was not clear to me in the way the report was supposed to be written. So by comparing the sample that Dr. Archibald had shown to the class to my rough draft I believe that I have figured it out. The comments posted by Dr. Archibald on the sample paper were great guidence for me. It also helped that during my writing conference session my tutor explained that the format of the paper was a rhetorical analysis not a summary of our chosen document. The problem was that I summarized Riis's document How the Other Half Lives instead of taking a slower appraoch by analyzing how he writes to unveil his ideas and beliefs. I learned that just by seeing the writer's tone and style of how he fromatted his work I can understand the author's true motives and what exactly he or she is trying to point out. Before I thoght the focus of the report was to report all that we learned from reading our chosen document. However the focus is more of a mix of what questions do I have from reading it and what we understood. I should use most of my quotes and paraphrases from my other sources to either help anwer my questions or help get my point accross. I also need to leave out more of my opinion on the subject. The paper is suppsed to be our reaction to reading our document and waht we don't and do understand from it. I need to use more info from my other sources that connect to my topic. At the end when we have to mention how our subject relates to today's world, I plan on connecting Riis's ideas and actions to today's relevant issues. I am very optimistic now that I can successfully write a hopefully great final draft. 

They Say/ I Say Response 1

The exercise I chose to do is number 1 on pg40

After reading Zinczenko's main claim that there aren't any inexpensive and convenient alternatives to fast-food restaurants I decided that I whole heartedly disagree. The groceries that one could get for one week could easily cost less than buying fast food for a whole week. Also all the grocery bought food would be at the person's house. How is that less convenient than having to go out to eat everyday? That person is also responsible for chosing the healthiest food for the most cost beneificial price, and even that isn't impossibly hard to do. Lastly fast food is so unhealthy to start that nearly everything in the store is healthier regardless.

To say that obesity and other medical issues linked to it has gone up a bit the past years is an understatment. It has increased so much that the government simply refers to it as an epidemic. Zinczenko backed it up himself by stating health care costs since 1969 has gone up by at least 100billion a year! Wait there is more, that is only from what diabetes has caused. Diabetes is only one of the many health concerns linked to obesity. I strongly believe that being overweight is greatly more of a medical problem rather than a problem of cultural stereotypes. Mainly because a sterotype doesn't put your own health at risk or cost the government health care fees.

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The topic for my report is immigration and I chose to focus on Jacob Riis's work How the Other Half Lives  to gain some more knowledge on this subject matter. This was the topic that I chose because since reading the book Enrique's Journey I believe that I have grown into an interest about the stories of immigrants' lives. Also I wondered what kind if any at all connections and similarites there might between todays immigrants and those seeking a better life in the U.S. from the past. I started my research with Riis's book itself which I found easily on the course mindmap. I learned that this book of his depicts what the living conditions were like in NY city for many immigrants and it didn't take me long to see that Riis was focusing on how poor life was in the tenements.Also he further explained how the owners of these tenements were driven by their own unsympathetic greed to completely disregard the immigrants' health and safety. Finally I found an article about Riis while using the library search engine. In this document I located some key info on Jacob Riis's personal life. For example, Riis was an immigrant from Denmark who struggled to get off his feet in the U.S. while facing many similar obstacles that nearly all immigrants encounter. However through hard work and perseverance he rose to fame and I believe he used his success to help all immigrants by covering their stories through his writing and photography for the whole world to see.

- Westin Fisher